simple love notes of life
The first kisses of fall are starting to melt into being. The colors of flowers are singing their most brilliant tunes and warm days and cold days are equally likely to occur on the same day. I love fall!! Everyone is back into school, and not yet burned out. Football is practiced and played and laughter fills the air.
I don't remember the last time I felt this happy, this free. I was asked the other day if my heart is still heavy, still sad....and it is. But finally I feel it has the freedom to grow and heal, maybe even move on. There is this fear that all the joy of my new job and life are just passing. That the winds that have beat me will suddenly return and I will again enter months of sadness questions and confusion.
However, two things stand out. One - God is good all the time. His goodness never fails and the hope of Him and all He has in store are worth waiting for. Two- Why worry about tomorrow when today is so beautiful and there is nothing I can do about tomorrow because ultimately tomorrows reality only lays in my hand as a possibility...not a fact.
My mom reminded me today that though I may have gone through, and go through again rough periods of time where hoping seems ridiculous because fact is so against it, and taking one step feels like running a marathon in a leap...she reminded me that those things send my roots down deep. Each trial we face and remain steadfast in. Each day we choose to praise and look to God, even when the joy doesn't bubble into a feeling of happiness...each of these days makes us stronger. Like a tree in the desert whose roots go so deep that it doesn't matter if it rains or not because its source of life has nothing to do with the circumstances of the day.
The deep deep well of God's love. HE was so good to me today. My love note from God today was a couple of minutes where I got to sit beside a rose garden enjoying a warm blue sky blazing above a water fountain framed in my view by hundreds of multi colored roses. And finding the time to do laundry, laugh with teens and attend a football game. And I did not get pulled over for the head light out on my car! What more could someone want! Such beautiful love notes from God!
I don't remember the last time I felt this happy, this free. I was asked the other day if my heart is still heavy, still sad....and it is. But finally I feel it has the freedom to grow and heal, maybe even move on. There is this fear that all the joy of my new job and life are just passing. That the winds that have beat me will suddenly return and I will again enter months of sadness questions and confusion.
However, two things stand out. One - God is good all the time. His goodness never fails and the hope of Him and all He has in store are worth waiting for. Two- Why worry about tomorrow when today is so beautiful and there is nothing I can do about tomorrow because ultimately tomorrows reality only lays in my hand as a possibility...not a fact.
My mom reminded me today that though I may have gone through, and go through again rough periods of time where hoping seems ridiculous because fact is so against it, and taking one step feels like running a marathon in a leap...she reminded me that those things send my roots down deep. Each trial we face and remain steadfast in. Each day we choose to praise and look to God, even when the joy doesn't bubble into a feeling of happiness...each of these days makes us stronger. Like a tree in the desert whose roots go so deep that it doesn't matter if it rains or not because its source of life has nothing to do with the circumstances of the day.
The deep deep well of God's love. HE was so good to me today. My love note from God today was a couple of minutes where I got to sit beside a rose garden enjoying a warm blue sky blazing above a water fountain framed in my view by hundreds of multi colored roses. And finding the time to do laundry, laugh with teens and attend a football game. And I did not get pulled over for the head light out on my car! What more could someone want! Such beautiful love notes from God!
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